As the dust settles and I review the weekends events, one thing is certain, no matter how alone you feel it’s never the case and always by choice! I’m truly humbled and forever grateful for the love and support I received over the past week from my amazing family to people I haven’t met personally, yet still they offer encouragement.
As most have read, IMNZ wasn’t the race I had trained for but as always it was the outcome I needed. To be clear, finishing any ironman let alone one of the most iconic in our sport is a true gift and something I’m proud to have achieved, however my goal was to race, compete and improve. The last few months have been filled with change, some good/great others not so good, however all were needed. Unfortunately this left me mentally fatigued and as Stuart Walter had advised me over the past couple weeks, there journey isn’t always up when making psychological/neurological changes.
Physically I feel good, mentally well lets just say growth is occurring and after a very powerful call with Stuart Walter (so grateful for your time), a path forward is right in front of me, now it’s time to chose that path and actions required to actually learn from the past and create a positive future!
That said, as proud of the achievement I am, disappointment still remains with the result. My coach and I had specific goals for this race and they weren’t met which I take full responsibility for!
Regardless of my excuses there is always a choice, #etpa and #evolutioncycles have chosen to support and believe in me going forward, setting me up with specific training and now racing gear, to which I did no justice! (My #evolv wheels were amazing )
To have still achieved the result I did on a day where I wasted more energy filling my mind with negative self talk than actual physical output is a reflection of the physical potential, the frustration is finding the avenue from potential to actual……
The final punch came when I found out that a kona spot was there if I wanted, to pass on this hurts as you never know if the opportunity will be there again, however as is always the case, one door closes, another opens thanks to my sponsors and club an entry to Cairns IM, Asian pacific championships! I love this race, location and definitely have some unfinished business there!!
The body feels great since IMNZ and the motivation growing every day thanks to the kind words and support of those around me. I can’t wait to get back into training next week but also enjoying a few days of rest which hasn’t happened for longer than I can remember!